What Makes a Good Daddy.

Recently I was asked to contribute to a book that is coming out about lessons learned from LDS dads. While it was an honor to be asked to contribute, it says little about my writing abilities and lots about the kind of daddy that I have. Really, he's amazing. I'm still not sure if my story has been selected, but the book is being published by an imprint of Deseret Book and is coming out in a couple of months. I'll keep you posted on that end...but I've been thinking about how lucky I am to have the kind of dad that I do. Yesterday, I was frustrated with my ex husband because of his lack of involvement with the kids. Until this last month...since Christmas, he'd seen them for 3 visits. that's it. Then I talked to Layton and explained that Jonah didn't know that he was his dad. I asked if he would just sign over rights to the kids. He said he would never do that. I told him in a nut shell that just because he doesn't sign a paper giving up his rights, every time he flakes out on a visit or just doesn't see them, it's giving up his rights. I told him that just because he's their biological father, it doesn't mean that he'll have a relationship with them and if he doesn't make the effort....later on they won't either. Also my dad, who again is the best dad ever...and an ever better grandpa told Layton's parents. He told them that he wasn't being a good dad and that he wanted them to know that he knew that.
After that he started making some effort. Even so, it's been about 6 hours in 4 weeks, and that's the most he's seen them in about 8 months.
It's sad and frustrating to me. But there's not much I can do.
My dad has totally stepped up. He has taken them camping (on many many camp trips) They've gong to see fireworks and parades.
It's back to school time and both of them are going to be going to school. Logan will be in Kindergarten and Jonah will be in preschool. Over the past several months I've spent over $400 getting them ready for school. That's fine, they're pretty much ready. They've got their little jeans and spiderman shirts and superhero book bags etc. Well. I forgot about shoes. I decided that I would ask Layton to help buy one of the boys his shoes for school. I forget sometimes that Logan hears EVERYTHING. He was playing downstairs when I called to talk to Layton. Obviously, he wouldn't do it. I told him pretty frankly that was fine, that I would buy them because it is important to me that they look their best. I got off the phone and was just so frustrated with the whole situation that I started to cry. Logan had quietly crept into the other room and came up to me and said "Momma, don't cry. You're my best momma." I laughed and hugged him and told him that I was ok. Logan has these little moments of wisdom sometimes. He looked at me and said "Mom, my dad Layton lets me down a lot, but guess what? Even when he does I have my grandpa and he's always there. and if grandpa wasn't there, heavenly father is, and so I'm ok."
Thank Heavens for Grandpa and Heavenly father, and a five year old who is wise enough to understand that.